
He was not supposed to leave. He had promised to be my side after his last call of duty. And he kept his word. It was an idyllic life, filled with music, books, food and long walks. I was happily busy, he was contentedly lazy, what else could one desire!
Then a phone call changed everything. I cried, I pleaded, I sulked but his set jaw told me his mind was made .
“I cannot refuse to go”, he said flatly. “You know what the situation is like. And once its over, I’ll be back.”
Through clenched teeth I asked, ” For how can I be sure?”
“I shall see again the world on the first of May”, he promised grimly, a steely glint in his eyes.
I live on tenterhooks, waiting anxiously for April to end.
Written for dVerse. Today’s host, Merril, says: Write a piece of flash fiction or other prose of up to or exactly 144 words, including the given line.
“For how can I be sure
I shall see again
The world on the first of May”
–From “May Day” by Sara Teasdale
Splendid write 👏👏👏
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Gabriela, thank you so much! ❤️🌷
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My pleasure sweetheart ❤️❤️❤️
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❤️❤️
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Excellent write…words like “steely glint”, “grimly”, “flatly”, “clenched teeth” and “tenterhooks” really carry the emotion here.
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Lillian, thank you so much.
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Just stunning, almost like a film somehow…you brought us fully into the characters..there was a lot if technique, too, in foreshadowing, and delaying, so that the story told itself in a really interesting way. Both you and Bjorn wrote the story I would have liked to (though would not have managed to do it so well at all…so I’ll need to get thinking…
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Ain, I so appreciate your comment. I wanted to respond to the prompt before going to sleep and thus drew a bit from my own experience while writing this. That you would have liked to write something like this, is high praise. Thanks a lot.
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Excellent, Punam. I agree with Ain, so vivid, like a film. And I can imagine this scene has been played out often.
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Thanks a lot, Merril! 💙 It was a very interesting prompt which I am sure has had many beautiful takes.
I wrote the first thing that came to my mind drawn from my own experience.
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You’re very welcome! 💙
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Nice one Punam.
Thanks for dropping by to read mine
Much💛love
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Thanks, Gillena. My pleasure. 💙
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Well done!!💖💖
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Thanks a lot, Cindy. ❤️🌷
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Always Punam!! 💖💖
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splendid writing, using a bit of home truth with your vivid imagination … kudos sis!
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Thanks so much, sis! Home truths always come handy! 😉
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Well done! The war theme is trending. So many perspectives on one ugly topic.
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The war is on everybody’s mind and we all want it to end. Thanks, Susan.
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Oh it’s so real Punam. Well done.
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Thanks a lot, Sadje.
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You’re always welcome my dear friend
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I felt the intensity of emotion in the dilemma and the certainty of both his leaving — and his returning. Good storytelling, Punam.
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Coming from you, Li, it is a compliment I will treasure! ❤️ Thanks a lot. 😊
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You’re most welcome, my friend ❤ 🙂
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Such suspense here!
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Thanks, Carol!
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What a tender moment you’ve created. The dialogue works wonderfully.
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Thanks a lot, K! I am not very good at prose, so this means a lot. 💙
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Well, I’d say that’s your inner critic talking and this post proves most definitely otherwise. 💜 I tell my critic to zip it almost every day.
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I’ll try to do that too! 😅
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Beautiful story and name too. I loved it, dear Poonam ❤️
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Thanks a lot, dear Jane. ❤️🙏🏼
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You are welcome, dear Poonam ❤️
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Yes, well done, it did feel like a movie, I wanted more, but somehow got what I needed from your piece! 💝
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Thanks a lot! ❤️ The word limit did not permit me to go on.
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✨💕
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Your characters jumped off the page! Excellent and terrifying all at once – I can feel her heart tremble in anticipation of May Day…
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Ah, Val! Thanks a bunch!
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SO perfectly and beautifully done for the prompt!!
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Thanks a lot, Pragalbha.
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I love the unraveling and the techniques you made to make it more impactful. Can feel the anguish and the desperation, Punam, especially in this last line:
I live on tenterhooks, waiting anxiously for April to end.
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Thanks, Rosema. It can be harrowing to say goodbye during tough times
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oh, i cannot agree more, Punam.
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For how can we be sure of anything?
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We can’t. We are living in the most uncertain times.
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Too many in this situation. (K)
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I agree, Kerfe. So many going through heartbreak.
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Excellent work with the prompt, Punam!
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Wonderfully done, Punam!
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Thanks a lot, Ingrid. ❤️
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You’re welcome, Punam!
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You rocked this, Punam – and I love how you cleverly broke the line up! 😀
❤
David
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Thanks so much, David! 😀❤️
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I think a lot of stories this week could become an excellent short story collection… yours about that upbreak from an idyllic world is excellent and bring us much closer as humans to what war really is allo about.
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Thanks, Björn. It would certainly be ab eclectic collection of stories.
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Amazingly expressed, Punam. It’s lovely. ❤️
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Thanks so much, dear Jeff. xoxo
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You’re welcome, dear Punam. Always. xoxo
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Oh, sweet and poignant. I hope he returned safe. This is a thrilling read, Punam, one that leaves us gaping for more. ❤
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That’s very kind of you to say. Thank you.
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Very much welcome, and thank you too.
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